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Funny and Stupid Drunk Texts That People Have Ever Sent

Today we should put a warning on smartphones that says, ‘Don’t drink and text.’ We have all been there; after a night of drinking, high on life, the bar closes, and you long to continue the party, leading to a rash of drunken texts and feelings of shame. What can be more pleasant than waking up in the morning and seeing all the drunk text messages you sent last night! While there are probably a few regrettable texts to your ex, there are probably tons of funny drunk texts your friends will forever thank you for (and never forget).

Drinking alcohol lowers inhibitions and softens the reaction to social restrictions. As a result, people tend to feel less uncomfortable and anxious in social situations. They also find themselves more relaxed and able to do things they had previously been hesitant to do. It’s not true for everyone who drinks alcohol because some people react to it in a very different way, but that’s the case for most people.

Below, we have compiled a list of some of the most stupid and hilarious drunk texts. You’ll find typos, interesting emojis, and tons of hilarity in drunk texts, including kittens, dance moves, and even forgetting that the drunk party was in their house. There are those who profess their undying love, and then there are those who simply want to know that there is someone out there who cares and will pick them up since they aren’t sure how to get home. Others’ texts are so difficult to decipher that we don’t understand what they’re saying. Their drunk texts are a great read, no matter the reason.

#1 Oh bro…

Oh bro...

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#2 You were so drunk last night

You were so drunk last night

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#3 Officer in the uk sends a text to a man he gave a ride home to when he was drunk. Even the police are classy gentlemen over there

Officer in the uk sends a text to a man he gave a ride home to when he was drunk. Even the police are classy gentlemen over there

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#4 I’m drunk

I'm drunk

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#5 Gurl u got da wrong number

Gurl u got da wrong number

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#6 Hagrid!!

Hagrid!!

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#7 Mom is happy

Mom is happy

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#8 How drunk was i last night?

How drunk was i last night?

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#9 Drunk jess

Drunk jess

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#10 Last night i was so drunk i replied to my own text

Last night i was so drunk i replied to my own text

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#11 There’s no way in hell i was that drunk

There's no way in hell i was that drunk

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#12 Drunk text

Drunk text

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#13 Dating an idiot

Dating an idiot

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#14 Apparently i tried to log in to my online banking when i was drunk

Apparently i tried to log in to my online banking when i was drunk

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#15 Best friend and a drunk me text

Best friend and a drunk me text

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#16 Farmville ftw

Farmville ftw

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#17 Just got a drunk message from my dad

Just got a drunk message from my dad

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#18 Remind me never to go on carousell when I’m drunk and high ever again

Remind me never to go on carousell when I’m drunk and high ever again

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#19 Liquid clearly did something to be last night. Sorry boohoo customer service

Liquid clearly did something to be last night. Sorry boohoo customer service

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#20 How not to drunk text your friends that like cats

How not to drunk text your friends that like cats

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#21 An obese penguin

An obese penguin

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#22 I am the batman

I am the batman

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#23 Why can’t i just drunk text like normal people?

Why can't i just drunk text like normal people?

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#24 I love alcohol

I love alcohol

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#25 Dealing with problems like

Dealing with problems like

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#26 I was trying to drunk text my gf last night but sent it to my boss instead

I was trying to drunk text my gf last night but sent it to my boss instead

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#27 Best drunk text of 2014 goes to my wife

Best drunk text of 2014 goes to my wife

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#28 Going through my messages after a night of drinking

Going through my messages after a night of drinking

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#29 Most people drunk text their ex or someone they fancy…. Not me…. What the actual fuck was going through my drunken mind

Most people drunk text their ex or someone they fancy.... Not me.... What the actual fuck was going through my drunken mind

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#30 May or may not be drunk at this moment in time

May or may not be drunk at this moment in time

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#31 Friend so drunk, replied to himself

Friend so drunk, replied to himself

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#32 Got so drunk last night i thought i was texting my friend for a ride, but i was just texting myself for the whole time

Got so drunk last night i thought i was texting my friend for a ride, but i was just texting myself for the whole time

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#33 Smooth move drunk me…

Smooth move drunk me...

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#34 Crap

Crap

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#35 This unfortunate soul

This unfortunate soul

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#36 I was rudely awakened from my sleep by drunk text messages from the undergrad i supervise in my lab… Let’s just say Mario cart saved her ass

I was rudely awakened from my sleep by drunk text messages from the undergrad i supervise in my lab... Let's just say Mario cart saved her ass

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#37 My drunk friend

My drunk friend

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#38 Going to FBI

Going to FBI

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#39 Free queso

Free queso

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Written by Violet Nina

I am a rebellious storyteller, costume designer, and sort of an artist. I love partying, dancing, loud trance music, and prefer fishnet over Leggings.

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